3 January 1980: My mum wouldnt hug me as I left, so I hugged her. No brothers and sisters. Thank you. One of the greatest signs of my own sense of independence when I left care was the day I could ask for help when I needed it. I was different. I have no one to dispute or agree on the memory of me, good or bad. Sissay reflects on his childhood, self-expression and Britishness, and in doing so explores the institutional care system, race, family and the meaning of home. This was quickly followed bySuitcases and Muddy Parkswhich spoke of proving yourself to your parents and he fleetingly remembered how his own mum and dad went off one way, whilst he went off with a social worker. Lemn Sissay, writer and Chancellor of the University of Manchester, held the Great Hall of Bolton School Girls Division mesmerised during an emotional rollercoaster of an evening. He dived into Mums arms and said: Mum, I beat Norman, didnt I? She stroked his head and said: Yes, you did. And then she looked at me. Interspersing readings from his new collection Gold from the Stone with moving and raw recollections of his childhood, Lemn transfixed the audience. Every one of us has a different story, says Sissay, beaming around the room in a shirt that is playing catch-up with the sun. Mum smelled like mums smell; there must be a smell a child is attuned to from being a baby, a cross between baby powder and witch hazel. He wrote about the experience in his 2010 poetry collection Whistle, which was shortlisted for a Ted Hughes award and which Figura later turned into an Edinburgh show. Now my mindset is slightly different. I was a very challenging and complex young person. His memoir about that time, Fifty-One Moves, is now taught at universities and Ashcroft is a founding member of the campaign group Every Child Leaving Care Matters. Lemn Sissay MBE is a British author and broadcaster. Postscript: After Woodfields, Lemn Sissay was sent to two more childrens homes. I was a deceitful one. Ripped away from his Ethiopian mother in infancy, he endured over a decade of mistreatment and wilful cruelty in the British care system. Lightening the mood with the short, punchySarcasmhe recalled how he wrote it in his Batman boxer shorts outside the backdoor of his house, his girlfriend having thrown him out after a row! My Name Is Why: Quick Reads 2022: Amazon.co.uk: Sissay, Lemn: 9781838854645: Books Skip to main content .co.uk Hello Select your address He was the eldest of three adopted siblings, all from different families. But I felt different. Akabusi joined the British army aged 16 and later embarked on a glittering athletics career as a sprinter and hurdler. Founder and executive chef, Bramble Dining, Aged eight, Richard Bramble and his older brother Greg, also featured, moved in with a foster family near Leamington Spa. After a succession of institutions, he left the care system, alone, and requested his files via customer services. "I wanted to hold them accountable for what they did," Sissay says. My brother Christopher was eight. Accidentally shares video of daughter over it can Listen to Capital Spoilers September 20 He felt that Normans successes were too many for [his brother] Christopher to cope with. In care from 11 to 17, Ben Ashcroft moved 51 times between foster parents, residential care, secure units, secure training centre, and finally a young offenders unit. Why - and the search for the answer to why - became the word that defined Lemn . When I was in the childrens homes, for years, I would play table tennis against a wall and imagine I was playing with him. 248 ratings29 reviews. Or 45 years. Hes now a fellow of the Royal Society of Arts and founder of a campaign group Every Child Leaving Care Matters. It didnt feel like a traumatic experience at the time, but as I got older it dawned on me that an older, white, middle-class woman with seven black children in her house, beating them with a cane, was a bit strange., Author and artistic director/CEO, Bernie Grant Arts Centre, London, I think of my life in two parts: before I traced my birth family and after, says former Guardian journalist Hannah-Azieb Pool, who detailed the journey in her memoir My Fathers Daughter (republished this year). I was mostly well looked after, he says, and learned to be happy in my own company., Ive become somebody to whom family and community is incredibly important, says opera singer Jack Holton, who was born in Kent to a single mother with health issues and fostered at an early age. Fortunately were all busy people, so we have to rush off. And suddenly theyre all gone, a fleeting crowd of one-offs, whose generosity with their time and their stories has created an indelible image. It was Lemn Sissay. His Landmark poems are visible in London, Manchester, Huddersfield and Addis Ababa. He expected a certain amount of difficulty from the exposure but its not made anything weird at all, he says. Instead of celebrating success despite the odds, we urgently need to improve the odds.. I had no idea Mum thought it was my fault. Author, broadcaster, chancellor of the University of Manchester. There were times when Dad was charged with punishing me in the front room with the cane. The exhibition Superheroes, Orphans & Origins: 125 Years in Comics runs there until 28 August, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning, Top to bottom, left to right: Clare Gorham, Keith Saha, Michelle Brown, Kriss Akabusi, Jim Goddard, Allan Jenkins (on the right), Stanley J Browne, Siroun Button, Martin Figura, Mark Riddell, Paolo Hewitt, Lucy Sheen, Lemn Sissay, Olumide Popoola, Paul Cookson, Lennox Cato (on the right), Sylvan Baker, Axa Hynes, Barrie Sharpe. It felt affectionate then, but later I realised something wasnt right. Lemn was born in 1967; two months later, he was taken into care. When my foster parents put me into care, at the age of 12, they said: Were never going to write to you, were never going to come. I could never have imagined that the people who said they were my parents for ever could do such a thing. Lemn Sissay reads from his new collection, Gold From the Stone, at Musicport festival in Whitby, 21-23 October, The poet talks about how his foster parents put him into care at the age of 12 and left him there, and finding his birth mother, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning, Lemn Sissay They treated me as if I was a Trojan horse sent into the family to destroy it., Lemn Sissay: My foster parents were good people who did bad things. Born in London, Henry was privately fostered at six months by a wonderful couple in Weston-super-Mare who encouraged her dreams of becoming an actor shes currently starring in Mad House in the West End. In junior school, he proudly announced that he was adopted and half-Pakistani. And he learned that his mother had been pleading for his safe return to her since his birth. The social worker handed Lemn to foster parents and declared his name Norman. Pete Turner was adopted at five months and grew up in Bury in a very liberal family that loved me, he says. Mcintosh managed to make it to university and now runs a Caribbean restaurant, Sugarcane London, in Wandsworth, but he remains scarred by his experiences. All images courtesy of contributors, Council where Logan Mwangi was murdered worryingly dependent on agency care, Councils in England and Wales pay 1m a year to house child in private care home, Private childrens home bosses in England criticised over huge profits, Council paid 60k a week for wholly unsuitable place for vulnerable girl, Almost a third of disabled children and teenagers face abuse, global study finds, UKhas sleepwalked into dysfunctional childrens social care market, says regulator, Revealed: money for educating excluded children funded Bolton bar owners social life, Bolton childrens home shut down for serious and widespread failures, Access to NHS mental health for children remains a postcode lottery, Childrens social care system unfit for purpose in England, Key to the photo of people whove spent time in care, with a list of their names, the notorious Shirley Oaks childrens home. I just felt this overwhelming relief when I found out the truth, he says, because I was always told, they didnt want you. For Fretwell, writing and making films is a way of dealing with both his care experience and the racism he suffered growing up in Bognor Regis. Lemn Sissay: 'My younger self did not deserve what institutions did to him' In a Letter to My Younger Self, the writer-broadcaster speaks candidly with The Big Issue about a childhood in care Adrian Lobb 6 Sep 2019 The memory of my younger self is something I struggle with. His shattering, light-searching memoir, My Name Is Why, is the result. Reconnecting with her birth family in Eritrea in her late 20s allowed me to realise the multiplicities of who I am, to make connections around inter-country adoption, and the idea that you can belong in multiple places and with multiple families. Author and national adviser for care leavers. But dont be fooled, she says. He has been made an Honorary Doctor by the universities of Manchester, Kent, Huddersfield and Brunel. It was the end of December 1979 and I was excited when I entered the front room for the family meeting. When he was four, Kriss Akabusis parents returned to Nigeria, leaving him alone in the UK with his younger brother. Lemn means 'why' in Amharic, the official language of Ethiopia, where celebrated poet Lemn Sissay's mother was from. She said: Take them off and give them to him. I didnt understand. Soon afterwards she died of cancer and De Abreu ended up, after several foster placements, living in the notorious Jersey childrens home Haut de la Garenne. When Lennox Cato and his older brother were adopted by a white family in Brighton, they stayed in touch with their birth parents, who had come over from Grenada. The sculpture commemorates the abolition of the transatlantic slave trade in 1807, which began the process of the emancipation of slaves throughout the British Empire. Sissay spent 12 years with the Greenwoods. Wallwein, who received an MBE in 2018 for services to spoken word poetry, had been in 13 homes before writing her first play at 17. Riddell wrote a memoir called The Cornflake Kid. Books were a way to escape from the madness around me, be that foster care, family, or residential homes. Its an incredibly common experience. They carry on, and people deal with them in various ways. Goddard is the chair of the Care Leavers Association, which focuses on care leavers of all ages it might help people access their care files, or deal with issues around social isolation. The Greenwoods were strict Baptists and their foster child's high spirits appeared to wear them down. The poemEmperors Butterfly Makerpaid tribute to the artists and entertainers who fill our leisure time he reminded the audience that once we have made our money we turn to music or poetry or art or literature, all of which have been imagined by someone. He really put it on the map and allowed it to be something that we could be proud of as an identity and talk about as a political thing. Ben Ashcroft, the author of a memoir titled Fifty-One Moves, was nearly one of them. Sissay was the official poet of the 2012 London Olympics, has been Chancellor of the University of Manchester since 2015, and joined the Foundling Museum's Board of Trustees two years later, having previously been appointed one of the museum's Fellows.--This text refers to the audioCD edition. A school report calling the boy "a ray of sunshine" is probed for racist overtones, and happily exonerated. Interviews by Killian Fox, I once was Christopher Goldsmith, reads a poem, neatly typed out on one side of a piece of A4 paper. Samaritans is a 24-hour service offering emotional support for anyone struggling to cope. Secrets are the stonesThat sink the boatTake them out, look at themThrow them out and float. By isolating and highlighting the success of care-experienced people it can become voyeuristic and soothes decision-makers into thinking that meritocracy is real. Growing up, the moment someone found out I was care-experienced, theyd make negative assumptions, says Lucy Reynolds, who had moved in and out of care eight times before being adopted aged seven. He told how he still had NG tattooed on him (for Norman Greenwood) but at that point changed his name and started the search for his mother who he finally tracked down in Gambia, where she worked for the United Nations. Catherine and David had no children when they took me. In. Why would I think anything else? Buy My Name Is Why: Quick Reads 2022 Main - Quick Reads by Sissay, Lemn (ISBN: 9781838854645) from Amazon's Book Store. I would narrate the game against Christopher, my invisible brother and Id let him win. Mum told me they will never visit me because it is my choice to leave them because I didnt love them. And he learned that his mother had been pleading for his safe . These are the words of Mr Graves, the headteacher in my files, in January 1976, from the social workers report: Spoke to Mr Graves several times on the phone and eventually visited the school. And his little dog, Sausages, learn to use only what they need as they help the. And then Lemn spoke elegantly and measuredly as he delivered a cathartic unburdening of his formative years. In terms of the care system, everybody has such massively different experiences, she says, and the fact that sometimes we are all put into one bracket is, I think, a little bit unfair., Artist, puppet-maker and puppeteer for film and TV, I decided quite early on that whatever happened to me, I wasnt going to be a victim of it, says Marcus Clarke, who lived in two national childrens homes in the early 60s, aged four to seven, while his mother was caring for his ailing father. Birthdays, Christmas, weekends, holidays I have to be the best family that I can be, to myself. Jenny Bagchi spent time in foster care and unregulated settings as a teenager before experiencing an abrupt end to care at 16. I spent my life searching for my birth family. Lemn Sissay's poem "Some Things I Like" celebrates what we might consider discardable like cold tea, ash trays, and even people. Rosie Canning, aged four, as a bridesmaid to her foster mothers son, 1962. His affectionate nickname was Bunty. You just get used to battling with everybody all the time, and you always have your guard up. It was a difficult situation, he says. Alex Wheatle grew up in care in the notorious Shirley Oaks childrens home in Croydon a very lonely existence, he says. Visiting my mum in hospital, Id see people screaming in straitjackets. The upside of his experience, he says, was that he had no fear from a very young age, and he connects this to his career successes DJing at Londons Wag Club in the 1980s, starting the clothing label Duffer of St George. Lemn thanked the audience, saying: You have been a blessing and shared my story. Available in used condition with free delivery in the UK. 31 December 1979: Message left after Christmas saying that the Greenwoods wanted Norman removed without further notice. Social workers report, 31 December 1979: Spoke to foster parents on telephone. Read the scriptures and give us your most honest and truthful answer tomorrow.. The result is an. He advocates for children in the local authority's care and is involved in organisations concerning their welfare. She lived with a foster family from 12 to 14 and then spent a couple of years in a childrens home. He said with age had come wisdom and he realised that bitterness rots the vessel that carries it; forgiveness for him has given him great release. It could be: this is everybodys problem., Ive started to connect with my identity as an adopted person a lot more in the past couple of years, says Luke Wright, who was adopted at five weeks. She was taken into a mother and baby unit as a 12-year-old mum, and had to fight to keep her daughter. If youd asked me as a child, Id be like, Oh, Im adopted but its not a thing. Now he acknowledges that there is probably some degree of separation anxiety as a result of not being with my mother in those crucial first few weeks. He thrives on praise and affection, in fact he cannot do without it. Social workers report, I hadnt realised I wasnt a happy child. Lucy Sheen was one of 106 Hong Kong Chinese foundlings who were adopted by white British families in the 1950s and 60s. My mother was a manic depressive, so I was in and out of care. Christopher, Sarah and I were on top of the world. It was about having support and confidence, and knowing what is possible, she says, I didnt even know what an artist was.. This is what I have chosen. Author and poet Lemn Sissay says there is "inherent prejudice against children in care". If you just want to be? Baker was transracially fostered from 11 days old. The lecture was the latest in a series of Arts and Science presentations which are taking place at the School in the evenings and are open to the general public. But success is not about being the lord mayor, she told a group of care leavers recently. At 12, Norman was sent away to childrens homes. My grandad and foster parents and I used to go down to the bay to get salmon, trout and mussels. Theres a sort of stoicism, he says, of how the experience shaped him. Id never thought of myself as a different person., Principal and artistic director of Bird College, Sidcup. One thing many share is dark memories of the shame and stigma they suffered. Lemn Sissay is a poet, author and broadcaster who was the official poet of the London Olympics in 2012. Lemn Sissay was stolen by the state. But there is no moment of revelation in this story where everybody hugs. His mother, a young Ethiopian studying in England, had refused to give him up for adoption when he was born in 1967. Macavity was such a contrast to my blond, blue-eyed brother Christopher. Most children in care have someone they can call family. He was badly bullied at school and his education suffered terribly, but he soldiered on and enrolled at Bird College aged 22 to study dance and musical theatre. CERI - Centre for Educational Research and Innovation, Ceremony of Carols Brings Light on a Dark December Evening, Local Primaries Compete in Maths Challenge, Cross Country Teams Crowned Town Champions, Girls Win Club Stage of Utilita Girls' Cup, 50th Tillotson Lecture Focuses on Biotechnology Revolution, Harriet is Swim Englands Breakthrough Athlete of the Year, Girls Lay Wreath During Armistice Assembly, Lacrosse Team Wins Northern Schools Tournament, One-Day Film School Develops a Range of Skills, Prize-giving Celebrates Outstanding Achievements. He was an introvert. Poet Lemn Sissay and actress Lisa Faulkner became friends on Twitter, united by one common interest: children in the British care system. In his memoir My Name is Why, the award-winning writer and poet tells the story of his fight for justice and finding hope and creativity while caught in an uncaring and dangerous bureaucracy. My brother Christopher is a year younger than me and I really loved him when I was a kid. He learned that his real name was not Norman. Now he works as a theatre-maker working with young and emerging artists, many of whom are also care-experienced. I remember the smell of wet heather, bracken and fern. I just felt I had to hide it, says Sophie Willan, creator and star of Almas Not Normal, of her experience in care she spent much of her childhood in foster care in Bolton. Where I grew up, in a very white conservative area, there werent any other people who looked like me for the best part of 16 years, she says. Now hes written a lyrical memoir describing his experiences, Lemn Sissay, poet, performer and chancellor at the University of Manchester, was born in Billings Hospital near St Margarets House for pregnant unmarried girls and women in Wigan, Greater Manchester, to an Ethiopian student on 21 May 1967. Poet Lemn Sissay says he felt obliged to accept his OBE because the award honours his younger self who overcame a "dehumanising" time in care. Night cant drive out nightOnly the light aboveFear cant drive out fearOnly love. Being in foster care is probably the primary reason why I had a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, says Derek Owusu, whose award-winning debut novel, That Reminds Me, explores the after-effects of a childhood in care. Written with all the lyricism and power you would expect from one of the nation's . are! We passed the butchers and the chemists and Wigan Road and passed the Flower Park and the main park, the junior school and Byrchall High School, and then unfamiliar territory unfolded before me: the East Lancashire Road. When Luis De Abreu was nine, he travelled from Madeira to join his mother in Jersey, where shed been working for several years. It was Lemn Sissay. On the back another poem is handwritten, composed on the train into London this morning, fresh on the page. Later I realised something wasnt right were times when Dad was charged with punishing me the. 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